Tag Archives: Darwin

Darwin has autism.

Last week, Darwin had a “full team evaluation” at The Children’s Hospital Of Philadelphia. He met with 4 different therapists and doctors who led him through various tests, engaging him in different ways to evaluate his behavior as it relates to the Autism Spectrum. Today, his mother and I met with the team again to discuss their observations, the diagnosis, and the recommended treatment.

The diagnosis is autism. Point blank, no bones about it. Does an atomic bomb do just as much damage if you see it coming? Yes it does.

We talked a good bit about specific parts of Darwin’s behavior, his strengths and weaknesses. I suppose the bulk of the conversation focused on the services and treatment we need to get for him. Let me tell you, it is an overwhelming mountain of shit. Schools, therapists, doctors, insurance, and an endless amount of red tape and bullshit to cut through. And at the end of the day, it’s pretty damn likely that Darwin’s life will always be harder, which is exactly what I never wanted. Since the day I knew of his existence, I was sure that I would do everything I could to make his life feel better, and a bit easier than mine has been. All of the awkwardness that the average child feels will potentially be amplified for him. There’s a very good chance that Darwin will always be “different”. The degree of that difference will only become clear with the passing of time, but I’m pretty damned sure that kids along the way will notice him being a bit different, and many of them won’t be kind. I was on the receiving end of plenty of bullying, and senseless pestering during my childhood and adolescence, and that was mostly just because of my appearance and taste in music. If I had some real, tangible “issue” to be pointed out… I can only imagine.

Trust me when I say I will do absolutely everything I can for this boy. But this sucks. =(

PS. Jenny McCarthy is an idiot, and vaccinations do not cause autism.

Something is up with Darwin

Before Darwin, I’d never spent any considerable time around young children. So once he was born, every day proved to be a new experience, which is still the case. Because of that, I didn’t have a great basis for comparison between him and any other “normal” kid. But once he became slightly more mobile and I started to see him in the context of playing with or near other children, I started to notice differences. Subtle differences maybe, but I saw them. I was told that I was being paranoid, and that he was totally fine.Continue Reading

Fatherhood: month 22

A few weeks ago, I was at the playground with Darwin, pushing him on a swing. He was smiling, giggling occasionally. We were having a nice relaxing day together. For whatever reason, it dawned on me that such a thing had never been shared between my father and I. I get really emotional when IContinue Reading

doom, ad infinitum

I lost my job. I kinda sorta lost it before when my boss ran out of money, but now it’s really lost. And it could not have happened at a worse time. After that whole moving twice in a row bullshit, I have way less money in my bank account. And in a month (ifContinue Reading

Abandoning the Batcave

I moved into my underground sanctuary at the end of July, and as of tomorrow, I will be gone. For a single, child-less guy, the Batcave would be fine. I didn’t love the fact that I couldn’t control my own heat and often felt too cold, but aside from that, the place served me justContinue Reading