Fatherhood: 15 months

Lately I’ve been feeling like I have so much on my mind, that forming a concise, focused blog entry seems impossible to do. With so much going on, and so many issues to deal with all the time, it could be easy to overlook some of these precious moments that I have with Darwin while he’s so young. Luckily I think I do a good job at keeping that perspective.

Since I’m a generally negative person, I spend plenty of time thinking about bad things, sad things, and just all around negative shit that I feel is sure to come my way. One of the most popular negativities in my brain is the idea that I won’t be able to have the close relationship with Darwin that I want so badly to have. It isn’t a complete fabrication of course; I get reminded fairly often that “things won’t always be this way”, referring to when he gets a little older and I’m no longer able to spend every day with him. Trust me when I tell you that I will be crushed when that day comes. I already shed tears just thinking about it. I want my relationship with Darwin to be as different from the relationship between my father and I as I can possibly make it.

Anyway, Darwin is awesome. At 15 months old he is running full speed through the house, park, mall, bookstore and anywhere else he’s let loose. He’s extremely curious about his surroundings, his favorite playthings are anything that he isn’t allowed to touch, and he has almost no fear or concern for his own well-being. As far as speaking goes, he regularly uses: mama, dada, baba, shoe, book, ball, and a few others. Unfortunately, the ear infections that plagued him through his early months have continued to be a problem. He’s now scheduled to have surgery to insert tubes into his ears in a couple of weeks. I’m told it’s a very common procedure, and that he should feel much better afterward. It’s a little worrisome, but I’m just anxious to have him be pain free since he’s spent most of his little life with these nagging ear infections on top of teething, constantly falling down, and all the other inherent hardships that come with learning how to function on planet Earth.

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