note to self: lie

darwin hand

I can’t win. Whenever I think I’m doing the right thing, I’m shown that it is wrong. As horrible and sad as it sounds, I get the feeling that the only way for me to survive the gauntlet of my daily life is to lie and hide every harmless step I take. And really, as far from perfect as I am, I don’t usually think I have much to hide. I’m a generally good person, with good intentions, and I usually have a handle on the difference between right and wrong. Despite all of that, I am in a situation that defies all logic, and me doing “the right thing” gets me nowhere. I feel like my only options are to carry around lies and bullshit forever… or lose everything. It’s a no-win situation for sure, and it is taking its toll on me.

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